And I Am Grateful

We are closing into a weekend of Thanksgiving here in Canada. And it’s not necessarily the day that provokes my words, but the opportunity to share them at a time when we are asking ourselves what we can be grateful for.

The other day I met a young girl. She was 17. She died suddenly on the end of a giggle. That’s all she recalled from the moment it ended. That she left on a giggle. And I my first thought was swift. “You are  grateful for the experience of dying on a giggle?”  She took me to the moment. I experienced the love of life on her final breath.

And she smiled softly at me and said…

“Wouldn’t everyone?”

And for that I am grateful. Because she showed me the way to find grateful in all of life’s moments.  And even for someone such as myself who desperately tries to lead the way forward, it has been difficult at times.  But I am grateful for the opportunity to try my best while being human at the same time and learning to find the gift in that also.

And so I will start backwards. At the beginning and work up to the present moment.

For All This I Am Grateful

I am grateful for the first breath of air for it allowed me to be. Without that gift I would not be sharing this today.

I am grateful for the parents that stumbled about trying to understand what parenting looked like.  They gave me the gift of  asking myself the same hard questions when my turn arrived.

I am grateful for the siblings that taught me that we all take different experiences from the same home.  They gifted me the understanding that we all see things uniquely and choose to take joy or discomfort.

I am grateful for the teachers that called me unmotivated. They provided me the gift of determination that would prove me wrong in my own belief of the same.

I am grateful for the man that said “I do” when my walls whispered “do not”.  He gave me the gift of unconditional to understand that broken is just as worthy of love.

I am grateful for the children that challenged me daily. The children that got lost in the broken and called me out on it. They gave me the gift of vulnerability and the ability to hear that I was not the parent I expected to be. And to be comfortable acknowledging that imperfection.

I am grateful for the bosses that made me try harder by asking for more than I felt I was willing to give.  They gave me the gift of understanding my value.

I am grateful to the patients that sat on their buzzer. They gave me the gift of patience and the ability to recognize that demands are often a cry to be seen.

I am grateful to those that held my hand while they passed from the physical world. They gifted me the experience of the peace in allowing.

I am grateful to the people in my life that forced me to let go. They gave me the gift of understanding what I can and cannot accept in my world and the voice to express those boundaries in the future so that I can learn to stop letting go.

I am grateful to the friends that are not fearful of offending me. They gift me with the ability to learn more of who I am and what I need to be whole.

I am grateful for good people. It gifts me the pleasure of expecting more beauty in the world.

I am grateful for the bad people. It gifts me the understanding that no balance can be struck without their existence.

I am grateful for those that inspire me to be more of what I am.  Whether in beautiful ways or painful ways I accept the gift of learning something new.

I am grateful for difficult times because it gifts me the beauty of reveling in the good ones.

I am grateful for the good times because they gift me the promise that difficult times end.

I am grateful to the grieving because they gift me the understanding that love is the most powerful thing we share. Because without it the pain of  grief would not exist.

I am grateful for a world that is in turmoil for it gifts me the ability to understand how we each find new ways to coexist despite the appearance that we cannot.

I am grateful to those that leave the earth. For they return to remind me what I need to grateful for. The grass under my toes. The ocean as it sings. The aroma of baked bread. The importance of family. The need for hard times. The gift of good times. The taste of sugar. The feel of cashmere. The pain of loss. The smell of dog breath. The sound of chewing. The smell of peppermint candy canes. The sound of church bells. The movement of breathing…

The music in one last giggle…

We have so much to be grateful for.  Even not recognizing that provides a gift. The gift of learning it.

And that is everyday until you do.

One day you will go back to love and forget how it feels to learn it.Imagine for a moment being there and not knowing how it found you.

Lets be grateful that we do.

Oh. And I am grateful for turkey and cranberries for it has taught me…yum. 🙂

Have a beautiful and grateful weekend.

Love

Tania