Fine Feathers

“Have you humans ever stopped for a moment to consider how angels are made?”

“Well no, but now you have me concerned that death is impending and I am starting to feel itchy. Can you allow me time to at least pull off the road before you take me because I really don’t think it’s cool to take the trucker along with us”

“Pluck em out. Leave the holes. Fill them with light. And shine Angel. Shine”

~the universe~

It’s 8 am on Thanksgiving Day here in Canada. I stumbled from bed at 6:30 am to ensure that our bird was prepped in time for a family get together later today. Last years was a fiasco when, after seven hours, I discovered that the bird had cooked to no more than a sickening shade of serous pink; this no thanks to an oven that I hadn’t recognized as broken. It was a flurry of panic as I dragged it to my daughters home and somehow managed to heat the BBQ to hell temperatures and cooked it in two hours flat. Today I am taking no chances, and have obsessively wandered in no less than four times this past hour to ensure that my oven is indeed hot enough to handle 20 pounds of bird.  So far so good. I’ll put my daughter on alert just in case.

I thought today was a good day to talk feathers. Or rather, to talk about “fine” feathers. These ones are significantly different than the course ones that were taken from Tom the unfortunate turkey recently. I’m sorry Tom. Maybe vegan in the next go round. I’ll try harder.

I got to thinking about feathers yesterday while on a long solo drive. Well, no, that’s not so much the truth. What I was thinking about was the ridiculous hold up on a highway full of construction cones, reduced lanes and the fact that my coffee wasn’t nearly as hot as it should be.  My chosen background music kept leaping tracks so I would be half flight into my incredible styling  rendition of a love song when it would lurch to something obnoxious and screechy. I finally acquiesced, rolled my eyes heavenward and muttered out ” Fine. I give up” and turned off the offending noise.  I leaned into my wheel to stretch my shoulders and heard a voice from the back seat.

“Let’s talk about it”

I’ll admit I hadn’t expected company yesterday and almost went off the road. My apologies to the transport driver to my right who saw the whites of my eyes. He sure did look frightened for a moment.

“Talk about what? My obnoxious vocals?”

“No, although it was mildly entertaining sitting here listening, that’s not what I want to talk about. I want to talk about your fine feathers.”

I glanced down at my hands for a brief moment wondering if someone had roofied my coffee.

“My WHAT?”

“Have you humans ever stopped for a moment to consider how angels are made?”

“Well no, but now you have me concerned that death is impending and I am starting to feel itchy. Can you allow me time to at least pull off the road before you take me because I really don’t think it’s cool to take the trucker along with us”

“You’re funny today”

“Thanks. It’s been a hell of a week. Humor is my survival instinct”

“How you doing Tania?”

“Oh, I’m great. There’s a body absent voice sitting in my car and my coffee is cold. Just a perfectly normal day. Otherwise I am fine thanks”

“Good to hear. And that’s exactly what I want to talk about today”

The last hour of my drive was about to get interesting.

FINE Feathers

Do you know that heaven is full of fine feathers?   To the pained soul these feathers represent a soft place to land when the human journey becomes too difficult to bear. And for the most part this is the truth. The angels that you  reach to in times of discomfort most certainly do offer for you a gentle support for the moments that your legs start to buckle.  But are they fluffy and pristine in shade as your illustrators may present?  Are they all holy and all knowing?

No they are not. And today I want to set you straight on the makings of an Angel. Today  I want you to understand why you find such comfort in their presence.

“I’m fine”

The catch phrase of the hurting. The words of the pained. The ramblings of compassion.

You’re not fine in truth. Let’s be honest about it. You have struggled with so many discomforts that you have become accustomed to them and accepted them as a part of the journey.  The gentlest and most pained souls knows these words all to well. And they use them often. It’s far easier to shrug off any and all discomforts under the veil of “I am fine” than to create discomfort to anyone listening. It’s much easier to bind them to your physical self and create an energetic wall that few, if any will ever break down.

If you have ever heard the words “You are so strong” uttered then you might just be on your way to becoming a genuine true blue Angel.

So here it is.

Angels are created from pain. They are not what you expect to discover on your arrival into your version of heaven. Angels are put together slowly, like tedious needlework each bearing a unique pattern.

And if I am honest we’d like less to join us. Or, I should say, we’d love to have you, but could you stop building your own version of wings first. We’ll gladly give you some on arrival.

Whoa. Well you weren’t expecting that were you!

Well let’s get right to the facts.

Feathering is incredibly uncomfortable and not something that we require you to do. No one asked you to martyr yourself into a set of heavy wings! But it would seem that the tools are right there down on earth with you. Every item you need to sprout your own shoulder adornments are within a fingers reach.

Emotional abuse. Physical abuse. Sexual abuse. Self abuse. Wars. Politics. Physical Illness. Spiritual Illness. Mental Illness.  Judgements. Lack. Greed. Identity. Bullying. Hate. Fear. Loneliness. Shame. Resentment. Anger. Self denial. Addiction.

With every small discomfort a small feather grows. Maybe an inch. Maybe a foot. Maybe no more than a millimeter. Regardless of the size of the attachment it creates pain. It’s easy to recognize it if you are paying attention. For every time you say “I’m fine” when in truth you are struggling, you will become aware of a discomfort that you cannot put your finger to.

We call it the emergence of fine feathers.

And we’d be happiest if you might stop giving them nourishment to grow. Because in all truthfulness we are getting mighty tired of pulling them out when you get here. It hurts us more than it hurts you.

Ask yourself how many times a day someone inquires into how you are. And reflect back on how many times a day you respond with “I’m fine”

And the discomfort of a new tuft occurs.

Angels are the humans who empathized but didn’t speak up. Angels are the humans who determined that by remaining silent of their own pain, they could best assist with the pain they recognized in others. Angels allow. They swallow the bitterness, they push the resentment aside and they help you. And it’s incredibly beautiful to be the person that wishes to take on the discomfort of thousands or one. But it serves you no good in the long run as the weight of your wings drag you down in the physical sense before ultimately pulling you upward. And only  here will you find respite from the feathers you have been carrying.

Your sacrifices will not go unrewarded. This much is true. As you ascend into love your wings grow lighter, the heaviness dissipates and you are free. But you are called upon to remind those on similar journeys to speak up. To speak out. To be vocal and reflective of struggles that they are enduring. You become the angels that stand by when called upon from a dark room through sobs. It’s a difficult job because most do not understand the reason they are there. We are not here to simply comfort but to commiserate the same pains..the same feathers..and to ask you to learn from us. To let you know as we wrap our feathers close, that we share your hurt and are hopeful that you find a new way to heal it.

You are slowly beginning to understand what we have been trying to do. One by one, you are stepping ahead to announce that you are not OK. You are stepping out of the darkness of your own rooms and being honest about what you are. Who you are. Why you are.  Speak out not for revenge of abuses but the healing of abuses. Speak out not for the celebrity of your voice, but for the voices that haven’t found their stage yet. Speak out to change the world not to challenge those who resist the change. Speak out to find the acceptance that you are not alone. Speak out to find your value in a world that often tells you you have none.

And then…come to us in your darkened room!. And tell us what you’ve done. So that we can celebrate with you. And pull from your backs the weight of a feather.

Angelic feathers are things of great beauty. They emanate light and provide a soft place to land when the human journey becomes too much to bear. But our hope is to create the light without the need to carry the weight in your world.

Yes, you are incredible. Yes, you open your wings wide to give comfort to those in pain. And yes, you swing them in tight to yourself to not burden others with your own. Feathers are both a gift and a curse. So lets just pull them away.

Earth Angels. Drop your weight. Pull the feathers one by one to reveal the holes that you have filled.

Light shines best through the broken. Not through the blanketed.

Shine your light. Let others find it. And change the world.

You’ll get your feathers one day. But instead of wedging them into the pain, we will drop them down to dance softly over the light that your holes have created.

Love one another.

And shine Earth Angel. Shine.

***No truckers were harmed in the “making of an angel”*** phewf.

🙂

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And I Am Grateful

The other day I met a young girl. She was 17. She died suddenly on the end of a giggle. That’s all she recalled from the moment it ended. That she left on a giggle. And I my first thought was swift. “You are grateful for the experience of dying on a giggle?” She took me to the moment. I experienced the love of life on her final breath.

And she smiled softly at me and said…

“Wouldn’t everyone?”

We are closing into a weekend of Thanksgiving here in Canada. And it’s not necessarily the day that provokes my words, but the opportunity to share them at a time when we are asking ourselves what we can be grateful for.

The other day I met a young girl. She was 17. She died suddenly on the end of a giggle. That’s all she recalled from the moment it ended. That she left on a giggle. And I my first thought was swift. “You are  grateful for the experience of dying on a giggle?”  She took me to the moment. I experienced the love of life on her final breath.

And she smiled softly at me and said…

“Wouldn’t everyone?”

And for that I am grateful. Because she showed me the way to find grateful in all of life’s moments.  And even for someone such as myself who desperately tries to lead the way forward, it has been difficult at times.  But I am grateful for the opportunity to try my best while being human at the same time and learning to find the gift in that also.

And so I will start backwards. At the beginning and work up to the present moment.

For All This I Am Grateful

I am grateful for the first breath of air for it allowed me to be. Without that gift I would not be sharing this today.

I am grateful for the parents that stumbled about trying to understand what parenting looked like.  They gave me the gift of  asking myself the same hard questions when my turn arrived.

I am grateful for the siblings that taught me that we all take different experiences from the same home.  They gifted me the understanding that we all see things uniquely and choose to take joy or discomfort.

I am grateful for the teachers that called me unmotivated. They provided me the gift of determination that would prove me wrong in my own belief of the same.

I am grateful for the man that said “I do” when my walls whispered “do not”.  He gave me the gift of unconditional to understand that broken is just as worthy of love.

I am grateful for the children that challenged me daily. The children that got lost in the broken and called me out on it. They gave me the gift of vulnerability and the ability to hear that I was not the parent I expected to be. And to be comfortable acknowledging that imperfection.

I am grateful for the bosses that made me try harder by asking for more than I felt I was willing to give.  They gave me the gift of understanding my value.

I am grateful to the patients that sat on their buzzer. They gave me the gift of patience and the ability to recognize that demands are often a cry to be seen.

I am grateful to those that held my hand while they passed from the physical world. They gifted me the experience of the peace in allowing.

I am grateful to the people in my life that forced me to let go. They gave me the gift of understanding what I can and cannot accept in my world and the voice to express those boundaries in the future so that I can learn to stop letting go.

I am grateful to the friends that are not fearful of offending me. They gift me with the ability to learn more of who I am and what I need to be whole.

I am grateful for good people. It gifts me the pleasure of expecting more beauty in the world.

I am grateful for the bad people. It gifts me the understanding that no balance can be struck without their existence.

I am grateful for those that inspire me to be more of what I am.  Whether in beautiful ways or painful ways I accept the gift of learning something new.

I am grateful for difficult times because it gifts me the beauty of reveling in the good ones.

I am grateful for the good times because they gift me the promise that difficult times end.

I am grateful to the grieving because they gift me the understanding that love is the most powerful thing we share. Because without it the pain of  grief would not exist.

I am grateful for a world that is in turmoil for it gifts me the ability to understand how we each find new ways to coexist despite the appearance that we cannot.

I am grateful to those that leave the earth. For they return to remind me what I need to grateful for. The grass under my toes. The ocean as it sings. The aroma of baked bread. The importance of family. The need for hard times. The gift of good times. The taste of sugar. The feel of cashmere. The pain of loss. The smell of dog breath. The sound of chewing. The smell of peppermint candy canes. The sound of church bells. The movement of breathing…

The music in one last giggle…

We have so much to be grateful for.  Even not recognizing that provides a gift. The gift of learning it.

And that is everyday until you do.

One day you will go back to love and forget how it feels to learn it.Imagine for a moment being there and not knowing how it found you.

Lets be grateful that we do.

Oh. And I am grateful for turkey and cranberries for it has taught me…yum. 🙂

Have a beautiful and grateful weekend.

Love

Tania

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Life As A Psychic Wallflower

I’ve stood in front of no less than 5000 people in this last ten years. I am still shocked to be truthful, given that I couldn’t even pee in a public bathroom until I was 40 and only then because well..three kids..impatient bladder..there was no other option but to make peace with it.

For anyone that has seen me in a live show environment it may come as a surprise to discover that I am incredibly uncomfortable there. I am not entirely sure what I am doing up there; in fact, I am not even sure how I get there in the first place.  I simply know that someone sweeps onto the stage like she was born to it, but I seriously don’t know who that person is. The only thing that makes sense to me is that I have a spirit guide that dives in and takes over before I have the opportunity to sage them into stupidity and run off to my corner to hide. I suddenly find myself staring into the top of a microphone and off we go. I have no explanation short of divine intervention.

It tends to throw some people when they meet me in an environment  that is new to me and doesn’t come with a microphone attached.  That’s pretty much any place where people gather and it’s ten times worse when it’s people I don’t know. There can be one stranger standing in a gymnasium and I will make every effort to stealthily move along the wall like Spider man trying to avoid being noticed. If I could throw string I’d simply swing over but in the real world…I’ll just glue myself to the nearest wall and avoid all eye contact believing that I am blending in and you will not notice me. Kinda like a praying mantis. You see me, you don’t see me. Except that it works for the odd green insect. Not so much for me. I’m too big and well..I’m not green and sitting on a fruit tree.

I am the most introverted and unintentional extrovert I have ever known.

I’ve stood in front of no less than 5000 people in this last ten years. I am still shocked to be truthful, given that I couldn’t even pee in a public bathroom until I was 40 and only then because well..three kids..impatient bladder..there was no other option but to make peace with it. To this day I will still lean over to scan for feet in the stalls to each side, and then carefully hold my breath while attempting to stream like a gentle brook babbling over pebbles. This is, however, becoming increasingly difficult to do and has taken on the sound of something similar to white water rafting as I move into my mid fifties. So now I have taken to making little tutt tutt noises with my mouth to deter you from the fact that I am emptying my bladder in the stall next door.  It’s quite a life let me tell you.  Peeing incognito to not draw attention and then dancing all over a stage with your grandmother five minutes later. I still struggle with understanding it.

Try to stop me and engage me in a conversation in any situation outside of my spirit stage and I will likely stare at you like a deer caught in the headlights. “Oh lord..you need me to talk right? Oh boy..how do I do that? What do I say? Why are you talking to me at all, I am not interesting and I just know I am going to trip over my own tongue. Please just back away slowly, you’re freaking me out a little”

But wait…hand me a microphone and push me on the stage and it’s all bets off. I open my mouth and something happens that even I don’t see coming. Words tumble from my face like confetti sprays on a bride and I suddenly become witty and wise all at once.  It’s messed up, because I am not witty nor wise in any other environment. Unless I am at home. There I am both witty and wise ( and smart and absolutely adorable)  although my spouse may call it something else entirely.

I cringe..I absolutely curl up from my toes when someone in a room full of strangers says “This is my friend the medium” Oh good God no. I think that often times people assume I am trying to hide that fact as a form of being standoffish, when in truth, it’s a protective thing to avoid having to speak to you at all. You scare me because you expect something profound to drop from my mouth, and the profoundest I can do is ask you for directions to the bathroom to pee quietly.

I realized how clearly I introvert when a comment was passed at the outset of my recent travel with my work cohorts.  An additional artist that I don’t know well was coming along on this tour and as I settled into my space in the passenger seat, Sarah remarked “And now this is where Tania will just sit quietly and not say a word”.  I was a bit taken aback until I realized that she wasn’t at all wrong in that assumption. I did exactly that for probably 2/3 of that entire ten days. On our long drive home she turned to me and asked me where I was as I stared out the side window.  I replied lazily, “I’m nowhere really, neither here nor there” She stared at me for a moment before we both agreed that I am a bit of a weirdo.

Why am I sharing this with you? Well, for a couple of reasons.  One being that I don’t really wish to be a social introvert but I am and there is simply no way of getting around that. It seems to be imprinted into my DNA somehow and no matter how hard I try to rewire, it’s here to stay.  The last thing I would ever want anyone thinking is that I am aloof when in truth I am just ridiculously shy and lacking in communication skills because humans for the most part intimidate me. Dead people clearly not so much right?

Which brings me to the main reason I am sharing today.

People will often ask me how I know what I know about details of lives that I have no connection to. How I know about the orange cat that you have at home, or the fact that you absolutely love blueberries. How I know that you sleep in your spouses old socks, or that your collie just died last week. How I know that you have a tattoo over your heart when you have a shirt on that allows for no physical reason for me to know at all…

How do I know?

Because I trust completely.

Because I know myself well enough to understand that without trust I sincerely have no voice.

I have somehow developed a collaboration of trust between myself and a world that many can’t reach. I don’t know how I did it, and that’s absolute. I simply know that somehow I did or that perhaps somehow they did. What I do know with certainty is that I don’t communicate well on my own; I never have, and I doubt I ever will. But someone speaks when I grab the microphone and I know without a doubt it is not me. Crowds scare the bejesus out of me so let me assure you that whatever is happening has little to do with me personally. What I do accept with complete faith is that when I step up to that microphone that I am given an opportunity to use a gift that I have no clue how I got. I have an opportunity to actually hear my own voice. For someone such as myself,  that is the greatest gift in the world. And your loved ones give that to me. Every single time I lift the mic. And what an incredible pleasure it is to accept that.  I am grateful.

How can I not trust something as beautiful as that?

 

Please don’t follow me into the bathroom deal?

In love….

Tania.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Air Sign or Attention Deficit? Your astrological back to school guide.

Disclaimer: I am not an astrologer nor a child psychologist. My opinions are based on many years of parenting and intuitive experience.  The below observations are intended as suggestions and guidance only. They do not replace the professional opinion of health care professionals.  Every child is different despite their similar sun positioning characteristics.

It makes me cringe when a parent comes to me struggling with a decision to medicate their child for certain behaviors. This is not to suggest that some children ( and adults) do not require some level of assistance, however for the purpose of this blog I want to assume that they do not. For the purpose of this blog I want to talk about typical sun sign characteristics that might come in helpful when dealing with your children.

I am doing so because; to be truthful, as a parent and grandparent it frustrates me to see your child medicated for something that can be considered typical characteristics of their sun sign. Keeping in mind that each child is different, raised in different environments and each has their own story, I will simply stick to the basics and allow you to decide for yourself what parts of your child is behavior and what parts are fixed by birth date.

The Air Signs

The three air signs are Aquarius, Libra and Gemini. While all present a similarity in their element they are truly as different as night and day.

Aquarius:

Take one part healer of humanity and blend with one part viper and you have your typical Aquarius. With an unusual ability to tend to those struggling, provide healing and nurturing you might expect to find a wayward animal hiding under their bed or a desire to adopt the child in the next desk because they look sad. Aquarius have a heart full of love to share. They can be quiet and loving or the class clown. Whatever way they feel that they can share healing they will adopt. And if healing means standing on their heads on their desk to change the environment then stand on their heads they will. The downside to this is their ability to rip your face off in a moment’s notice. Aquarius don’t often share this characteristic but be aware that it exists beyond their gaze. If they feel that their kind nature has been taken advantage of you can expect a litany of less than appropriate narrative to escape their lips with all the vengeance of a viper. Aquarius like to change their minds like they change their socks ( they best match their clothes by the way).  In a nutshell for your five year old Aquarius. Loving, kind, gentle. Intolerant of bullies. Will stand up and say no and say it well. Will turn into a disturbed rattlesnake on a dime, often leaving teachers and parents wondering what might be the root of this sudden shift. The root is that they felt overwhelmed or taken advantage of. Talk about this first before assuming a behavior issue is looming.

Gemini

I always say that Gemini is the most likely to be diagnosed with ADHD. I have always wanted to poll schools to find the highest degree of this diagnoses because I am certain that Gemini will come into the top of the percentile.  At times entertaining, infuriating and frustrating you have absolutely no idea where this child will take you from one moment to the next. Every moment is a new adventure. Easily bored they can become a source of frustration to even the seasoned educator. Over talkative and straight to the point, curious and questioning they are the adventurous soul, full of life, full of love and full of disruptions. Your Gemini loves to learn, but not necessarily in a confined environment. I call them the “new word everyday” sun sign. Bored quickly give them something new to challenge them! Lots of movement, lots of adventure and lots of patience will be required to handle these little ones. Oh, if you don’t like their decisions…wait five minutes….they’ll change it. Oh..and watch their little tempers…you never see it coming.

Libra

The natural balance in life. Little Libras detest confrontation of any sort and will go to great lengths to avoid it. I have a Libra myself and my biggest concern with him was that he would take the blame for everything in life just to avoid a fight. This can prove to be concerning in a school environment. Libras like balance in all situations and they will rarely choose sides in any debate. It is easiest in their little heads to just say that they caused the problem simply to make the problem go away.  Libra is particularly hard on themselves and their efforts. Be mindful of this because many school projects will be handed in late because something didn’t feel balanced. This can often be misconstrued as lazy, obessive or sloppy but in truth they are seeking perfection. Libra can easily take on the personality of those around them, they seek truth and will emulate those that they hold to be leaders in this manner. Remind them to be their own person first and foremost.

The Water Signs : Pisces Cancer and Scorpio

Pisces:

Think of two fish tied at the tails with one going one way and the other going the other. A tug of war ensues. Pisces are compassionate to a fault and will often be seen as naive, making them the perfect victim for the less than appropriate peer group. Pisces are natural born leaders but struggle with finding the voice they need to lead often until later in life. Their formative years can be a struggle between choosing to follow the right group and their need to fit in. Pisces are the chameleons of the zodiac..their ability to slide into situations is mind boggling. Be mindful of this as they grow older. There exists a very fine line between vodka shots and church with these kids. No matter what situation they find themselves in..they WILL fit in..due to their nature of absorbing the experience completely.  Encourage responsibility young with these kids. They live in a world of black and white. There exists no grey area. Provide outlets for the passions that drive them. Pisces children are dreamy and often mistaken as having attention issues. Nothing could be further from that truth. Ask them instead where they go during lessons and you will be treated to a world of fantasy and whimsy.

Scorpio

Ask your Scorpio child to write a poem about the sun and expect something straight out of Edgar Allen Poe. Be prepared parents. They can be seen as moody or depressed.  These children are the most intense of the astro wheel. They can fool you. Generally quiet and reserved, they are quick to snap to judgements and wherever the story lacks direction they will make up their own. Born diggers these kids want to know the answer, the reason and the motivation behind everything in life. And if the answers don’t fit with their decisions well watch out. They are incredibly stubborn when they feel that they are right. You could present them with concrete evidence and they will still cock their heads and remark “well I don’t know about that”.  Dramatic, intense and oftentimes brooding, they can be accused of sulking behavior. They can tend to be loners but its natural to them so don’t worry. These kids make incredible investigators or police officers due to their predisposition to believe there is more to any story. Scorpios can be misinterpreted as socially awkward and introverted.

Cancer

Soft, loving and incredibly quick to temper in the right circumstances. The cancer child can be loyal to a fault but don’t you mess with them. They forget NOTHING when slighted or offended. Natural born introverts they tend to keep their circle small and will often be found to be the listeners instead of the leader in a classroom setting. Little Cancers love their quiet time and their favorite subject will most likely be nap time. They are drawn to the underdogs because for some odd reason they seem to understand them best. Expect to find this child huddled in a corner with the disruptive ones trying to soothe them. If there is a pet in the classroom this child will generally have it cuddled in their lap. Cancer can be misinterpreted as having little direction or interest.

The Fire Signs Sagittarius, Aries and Leo  Domineering, determined and charming.

Sagittarius

Oh, you wanted a quiet child did you? Bright and inquisitive, these kids epitomize the word “why” and you will hear it many many times over. Natural debaters these kids possess a gentle ability to see both sides of any argument from a logical perspective and yet still win any argument. They are like mini defense lawyers in training. Very confidant when they find their niche they must be cautioned against being the solo voice of reason on any subject. A good debating club or position of leadership would suit them through their educational years. Naturally social they can have a tendency toward chattiness. They can be seen as lazy until they get their first job. At that point money becomes the focus and you will rarely need to remind them to get up for work.  These kids can be seen as flighty and without direction.

Aries

Keep an eye on your cunning little ram. Charming to a fault at times, they have an ability to wrap teachers and peers around their little fingers while creating their empire.  They are the consummate charmers of the classroom. Witty and bright they can make any experience memorable, but back them into a proverbial corner when called out on something and watch out. You’re in trouble. They will fight back with the ferocity of a tiger. Not fans of rules, they are incredibly intelligent, witty and industrious. Organized and bright, these kids make incredible leaders. They would do well a buddies to children younger, school council members and the like.  Not being pulled into the “way things should be” you could expect some push-back at school against ideas that are too confining.  This behavior can be seen as controlling or bossy. In fact, it’s anything but that. If anything at all it’s a desire to do things more easily to arrive at the intended conclusion.

Leo

Oh the charmer..the leader…the loyal and the true. This is your little Leo. Natural entertainers these kids can take control quickly with their humor and their predisposition toward desiring attention. This is the child that will never walk into a classroom unnoticed. Leos are hard little workers and know to settle into their expected duties and are generally little problems to anyone. Loyalty is their buzz word and if they feel that you are not living to their standards they will roar and walk off never to return. Encourage these kids to be more forgiving of their friends. Due to their charming nature they can be sometimes seen as manipulative. Many teachers have fallen for their big eyes and soft smiles. Very creative they should be encouraged to follow their passions.

 

Earth: The sure footed of the astro wheel your Earth signs are responsible, determined and difficult to sway. 

Taurus

Oh the formidable bull. A frustrating mixture of you never quite know what you’re getting. Your Taurus child is a born leader and will often be referred to as difficult and opinionated. They will simply not change their stance on any issue. Once their mind is made up good luck changing it. They will skirt emotional discussions with humor and a mild sarcastic wit. Incredibly calm in the face of any storm they provide others with a sense of being someone they can turn to for strength. Taurus are well known for their “I’ll do it in my time” way of life.  If you have expectations of something being done in your time..well..just stop expecting. You’ll just be banging your head against the proverbial wall. Loyal, steadfast and  private…they can often be considered to be holding back or not truthful, when in fact, they are simply respectful of their own private lives. Taurus can be seen as instigators or button pushers. A natural wit and sarcasm they will light fires and walk away giggling.

Virgo

The classroom helper. These kids are meticulous and well organized for the most part. They crave perfection and the discovery that perfection does not exist can create some issues. Virgo tends to gravitate toward the teachers that are prepared on time. This is not a loosey goosey sun sign. They are natural born leaders but be prepared for howls of frustration should their attempts go unnoticed. Any and all tasks they offer to assist with should be acknowledged or you will find yourself with a sullen child who feels disrespected for their efforts. Virgos hold others to incredibly high standards. They must be reminded that human is human and sometimes people are less than perfect. These kids can sometimes be seen as obsessive and overly controlled.

Capricorn

Capricorn is most likely to be voted school cop. If there is an issue developing you can fully expect your Capricorn to be on top of it and quickly. This can sometimes be seen as “squealing” to the fellow classmates, but to a Capricorn it is all about justice and doing the right thing. Even if the right thing isn’t exactly right at all. They will stick to their guns, dig in their heels and refuse to see it any other way. It is rare to see your Capricorn in the principals office unless they are filing a complaint about school policies or a bullying episode that went unattended. Born leaders they are well suited to school council or a position where they feel responsible. Put them in charge of the class hamster and all will go well. These kids can be assumed to have confrontational issues.

Look deeper when dealing with any school based issues. Understand your child first before seeking to push out natural tendencies.

Happy Back to School to you all!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You Are Your Soul Mate

If I have heard it once I have heard it a thousand times over.

“When will I meet my soulmate?”

Many are surprised at my response.

“You’ll have to die first, and I am assuming this isn’t in your present plans correct?”

It’s true. To come face to face with your soul mate will require that you both reside in the same place at the exact same time. So that part of the illusion is real. What saddens me is that somewhere along the lines they got blurred and we were misinformed into believing that we could locate them here.  And while we can it is not in the way that you may think.

When people talk of soul mates they naturally lean into the thought process that this is an individual separate from themselves. How is that possible? A true soul mate as we understand it is that one person that knows you better than you know yourself. That person that understands your every movement before you move, your every thought before it’s thought and your every desire before it’s desired. We’re humans not x – ray machines so this makes absolutely no sense at all.

There is no one walking on this planet that can read your minds. Psychics such as myself can read your life plans but that’s an entirely different communication that I will go into at another time.  Quite simply….no one knows you like you know yourself.

Your soul mate is you. Each living breathing human being resides in two distinct worlds at the same time. When you left the spirit side to take on the arduous journey of life, you left a part of yourself behind. Who else could you lean to to make decisions along the way if you hadn’t done so?

Your soul mate, your higher self, is the voice that asks you to hesitate. The voice that asks you to go for it.  It’s that feeling deep into the pit of your stomach that tells you this is the right direction, or the wrong.  Without this part of yourself you would move erratically through life with no compass at all.

Your soul self is a split of the same light. As you move through this lifetime your higher you moves with you. It becomes a dance of sorts, a communication that occurs in your next decision, your next breath or your next thought. Did you believe that the universe would toss you to the earth below to figure it out without a guide? Not a chance. That would be like putting a three year old into the middle of the woods and expecting them to find the way home. Illogical and dangerous.

Your soul mate knows you. Knows you because it has shared eternity with you. It remembers all the remembers that you don’t. Your soul mate is a blending of every lifetime lived. So that when you arrive back to it’s warm embrace, you are flooded with the memories of every single person you have encountered along the way. We tend to think so small because our brains don’t allow for anything beyond the years we spend here on earth. But what about all the years before these ones? What about your lifetimes prior to this? Do they simply evaporate into the ether never to be recaptured? Of course not.

If you are paying attention, those memories of times long long ago will drop in when you least expect them. Science calls them deja vu experiences. A recollection of something familiar with nothing to base the experience on.  I call them your soul mate looking through your book of life and reflecting on an experience from 1565. Memories are emotion driven and you will sometimes be drawn into the emotions and not ever know where they arrived from.

But the feeling of familiar is intense. And can be incredibly beautiful. And allow for you to change the way you might move through the remainder of your day.

Stop seeking your soul mate outside of your self.  No one can remember what you yourself can recall. No one shares the same experiences and manifests thoughts in the way that you do.  Your thoughts are living and breathing and impossible for anyone on this planet to understand or catch up with. The only one that can do that is the one that you share them with every moment of every day. You. You. Yourself.

Please cease looking for what will make you whole. Look instead for what will help you to find that wholeness.  Look instead for the person who will provide you with the tools necessary to know yourself completely, to know the what you were before you arrived into the delivery room and started to question who you are.

There is someone out there that can bring you to yourself. Someone with whom your own soul mate interacts on the other side. Someone who felt compelled to approach you on a crowded street yet they don’t understand why. Someone who feels things about life that you feel. Who challenges you to accept your own insecurities. Who angers you, evokes you to do deeper. Someone you may hate in one moment and love in the next. They are the other flame that gives you light. And often times their light can dance fiercely but it’s simply to shine into your mirror and help you to find your true self.

Someone with the same memories of times long ago. Someone to complete the circle.

Don’t search for them. They will find you.

Be peaceful. Be patient. And be open.

Your twin flame is the collision in your life. The one that will show you the wreckage, force you to bring it back together and help you face the beauty in your scars they create.

I hope you have found them. And if not, I hope you do soon.

But you will.

You have no choice.

Your soul is waiting.

 

 

 

In love…in light…

Tania

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Dead Relatives Guide to Living

Earlier today I saw a post on social media about the discomfort in buying and wearing swimwear. As I quickly read it, I was suddenly taken aback by a female voice in my ear “Tell ya, wish I could still look awful in a bikini”

It stopped me for a moment as I heard the melancholy in the soft voice.

I let her continue.

“You’ll wish you had when you get here. Had done what you wanted to do instead of worried about what people might think. You’ll wish you had done it anyway”

Her name is Jane. I don’t know who she belongs to or why she chose to intrude on my morning scrolling. But I do know that she wanted to share some points on living while we are alive. So here is her list word for word. Nothing is changed.

“You’re so scared of what people might think of you. You avoid so many adventures because you’ve been taught that you might be judged. You are afraid to sit in the middle of a restaurant because you feel guilty for eating; all because of a few pounds?  All because someone, somewhere in your life told you that you that you had to be perfect. And perfect people don’t eat cheeseburgers. We can’t eat cheeseburgers here, damn, we can’t eat a thing here. We have no need for that kind of nourishment. But, listen to me. My human memory would love nothing more than to dog down a chocolate shake and salty fries.  You are missing out on the incredible experience of sating your soul by ordering salad and water just to fit in. Eat. Be mindful and moderate but stop punishing yourself by not enjoying what will fulfill you.

How many times have you missed out on the adventure of a beautiful summer day? Arriving in the sand to find forty under 30’s out there in bikinis you decide that you don’t look good enough so you sit sweating like a defrosted turkey on the beach? Seriously, I am not kidding around here. You miss out on some of life’s best memories because you have a few rolls? Stop that ridiculousness right now. Get out of your own way, find a suit that covers your dimples that you hate so much, and share them with the world. No one is looking anyway. You are all too busy worrying about how you look to everyone else to care.  While no one is busy looking at you, you are busy avoiding life. Get it together. You need the sunshine.

How many times I found myself wanting to join in on the music. I would walk through the streets and hear songs on every corner. All I wanted to do was to dance but I was afraid that someone might see me and find me odd. How I missed a chance to just feel free for a few minutes. Don’t do this. Dance. Tap your foot, shake your bottom, tap your fingers..but do something.  You’re standing there as stiff as a board fence and you KNOW you wanna dance. Why aren’t you dancing? Take advantage of the fact that you are strong and healthy and you CAN dance.

Speak to each other. You came to the world smart. You know who is good to speak to and who you should avoid. When you feel pulled to reach to someone DO IT. Your own soul self knows what they need and what you can do to fill that need. Stop believing that you are not allowed to engage strangers. That stranger might be the one person that you need to change the course of your life. You don’t know. Stop assuming. When you feel called to respond, respond. Change your day and change theirs. It’s your job. It is your job to respond to what your soul requests. Your soul knows. Your brain gets in the way and messes up some amazing encounters.

Sing. I don’t care if you can’t sing. Not too many humans can so you are in good company. I don’t know how many times I stood in church and watched the parishioners whisper and glance about the room in shame.  That’s not singing! That’s not raising the roof and creating a choir. That’s pushing away your integral right to use your voice for something amazing. I always sang. Loud. Poorly. But my face shone and my spirit grew.  I felt motivated and alive. All from opening my mouth and letting my voice come through. It’s been some decades since I last did so. And no one remembers. That’s what you all forget. No one remembers you couldn’t sing. But everyone remembers that you did. Think about that.

No one remembers what you did poorly. Everyone remembers what you tried to do that made you shine.

Your memories, when you arrive to this place should be full. Your memories should include the worst fishing hats and the smallest catch. They should include the full dozen attempts to swim and sank each time. They should include your shorts and the hairy legs you forgot to shave. They should include your smudged lipstick, your less than perfect makeup and your less than perfect hair. They should include every time you tried to live your passion no matter how small the try was. You didn’t fail. You passed because you tried.

You let yourselves down. Every day and every moment. By glancing around the room fearful of judgement. By not trying to try in case you fall. By not singing because someone might be listening. By not smiling because someone may not smile back. By not being all that you can be on this journey because someone else can be that better. By not giving into your desire to laugh, to dance, to cry. You let yourselves down. By not seeking to learn, not seeking to teach, not seeking to speak. You let yourselves down.

Stop it.

I wanted to sit on Santa’s knee in my adult years. I wanted to challenge the thought process that only children were permitted that wistfulness. I stood year after year at the end of the line pretending to be someone’s parent. My legs wanted to walk right on over there and perch grinning wildly as the photographer snapped the photo. I never did that. I waited and waited for another mature adult to go first. They never did. I often wonder how many other adults waited behind me to see if I might go first.

I died at 65. I stood in line at 64. And said next year.

I am asking you to live. Without fear of living. To be silly, unpredictable and wise. To dance like everyone is watching you. To sing like everyone is listening. To find the worst bathing suit possible and saunter onto the beaches like you belong there.

Because you do. You belong here.

A favor for an old woman who grew old before she learned to live young?

At Christmas this year, find a Santa. Get in line and sit upon his knee. And take a picture for me. Grin wildly. And share it with everyone that you love.

That’s how to live.

We don’t ask for much on this side of life. We are afforded every beauty that we avoided in our human lifetime. We are loved deeply. We love each other deeply.

But we don’t have cheeseburgers. And we don’t have Santa lines.

That’s your job now.

Make us smile over here by living voraciously over there. Say hello to Santa. Tell him Jane sent ya”

Jane….

 

In love in light…dance…sing…eat…live…

Tania